Thursday, December 19, 2013


This might come across a little crazy.

So maybe that's nothing new, but this feels particularly crazy.

I'm happy.  Deep down to my toes happy.

This morning I had my third interview with the really great organization.  I have no idea how it went, but I feel completely warm and fuzzy when I think "I made it to the third round!"  I'm a contender.

I'm healthy.  Really, really healthy.  Running towards a marathon healthy.  No surgery on the horizon right now, no drugs in my system.  Really, beautifully, gloriously healthy.

I live not far from the water, and this morning I went down there and saw the pink in the sky, the waves crashing on the beach, the mountains with a dusting of new snow, and it just struck me how glorious it was.

And I have a really great house.  With great woodwork, cool old solid wood doors, a covered porch with a beautiful porch swing, and furnished with funky antiques (I call it my Jane Austen living room).  Katherine's room is filled to overflowing with things she loves, ranging from great toys to scraps of paper and notes from friends; my room is filled with candles and paintings of flowers and a bed with a zillion pillows on it and it's a girly haven and I love it.

Loyal dog.  Sweet cat.  Best footwarmers ever.

A message machine filled with calls, an email filled with notes, all from people who love me.

A mom who calls me every day.

And my girl - how on earth did I get so lucky?  Kind, smart, beautiful, silly.

I spend a lot of my life worrying, freaked out about the possibilities.  It's true, there is a lot of uncertainty, and I can't see how things are going to turn out.  There is good reason to worry, and I've spent my share of sleepless nights.

But today, I'm focused on how beautiful things are, even with the uncertainties....and I can't even believe it, because I'm not just thinking about it, I'm feeling it.


Thank you.

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