Tuesday, October 22, 2013


I am a super motivated person.  I've got a zillion things on the go, I'm full of ideas, I have more energy than most people.

Except that unemployment appears to be sucking that out of me.

It's exhausting!  Why is that?!  I want to crawl into bed and wait for....I don't know what.

I would rather be working.  I miss many things about work: scolleagues, contributing to a bigger cause, personal growth.  I am good at working and I stay pretty focused.

But at home?  My house is messier, not cleaner, and my yard is a wreck, and I have no excuse.

I applied for two jobs today, including the job that has me all twitterpated, and afterwards I felt like I'd just completed some incredible feat and needed to rest for about a million years.  The process is exhausting, and the risking rejection, and the knowledge that it's all on the line....well, it's enough to make me crazy.

I feel crazy, actually.  Unemployment is making me crazy.

I keep hearing from people who know me and who hold some great jobs that I am a fantastic candidate, that I can do this.

But it's so, so scary.

That's all.  I don't have anything profound to say today.  I'm scared, and worried, and I feel stuck a lot.

This too shall pass, right?!

1 comment:

  1. I feel you!1 I have been unemployed for a while now and it feels never ending!
    I keep trying to view it as a gift but its getting hard. As a 40 yo I have totally experienced age bias and it is so frustrating!! hard to keep your chin up. I like you try to keep thinking this too shall pass.